I'm not "mostly White," I'm *almost* White. There's a difference.

I know that if I took a DNA test, it would show that my white genes outnumber my Native genes.

I've got enough Native blood to keep my skin from going pale in the winter, and it takes me months to grow an inch long beard, and I've passed as White for 50 years until finally embracing the Cherokee part of me that my mother never let me forget was there.

My mom's dad, who was a half-blood, died two years before I was born. Still, the official BIA blood quantum is low. And to top it off, I've never lived in Indian Country.

Now, I've not encountered a single Cherokee who wasn't welcoming, or snooty, or hostile in any way. Just want to make that clear. But I have read stories and seen the online evidence of it.

As I'm cramming at 50 to learn everything I can to honor my ancestors and the price they paid for my sake, one of the "future generations" they lived and died for, the discussion of issues of identity is necessary. It's true. And it's happening.

What I don't hear enough in these dialogues that too often devolve into ugliness, is the blame that's due the invaders, their centuries long genocidal campaign to erase us from Turtle Island so that even the name Turtle Island is forgotten. They are why I'm so White. They almost got this Cherokee grandchild.

I'm not "mostly White," I'm almost White. That's their shame to bear, not ours. I'm proud to be Cherokee whether anyone else is or not. Those who bloodshame and discriminate have their own issues to reckon with. I've got plenty of my own issues to reckon with without taking theirs on my plate. I figure we all do.

Thanks for attending my Fire Talk (my Cherokee version of a Ted Talk, in case some don't get the reference, lol).

Has anyone else grappled with Cherokee identity issues? Are you in the midst of it? Come out the other side of it? Have any advice or words of wisdom to share?