Do they feel remorse / sadness / guilt?

I've had such a strange evening and I need some help to "sense check" myself.

I've started to question whether my emotionally abusive/controlling ex is actually all that bad - maybe he just is really anxiously attached and his anxiety got the better of him?

I was going through my bible app and got sick of it asking me if I wanted stuff private so I checked to see if I had anyone on the app who could see my stuff and saw my ex was still connected. Then I saw that he'd been doing some plans about anxiety and breakups and I was surprised - I'm happy he's looking after himself, but it made me question if he really was all that bad or if he was purely just anxious and needed some counselling / help with his mental health?

Obviously I don't want to go back to him but I wonder if my reaction was warranted.

Feeling a bit stupid because I feel like I took a massive back step in my no contact journey by seeing that. Up until then I was feeling pretty confident that I'd made the right decision (I'm literally booked in for some DV counselling next week, after police referral!), but it really does make me wonder.

I guess that's the hard thing about all this, not knowing how to trust yourself? Being empathetic to a fault?