The notion that “women are the gatekeepers of sex, and men are the gatekeepers of relationships”, is frankly untrue

I’ll concede the first part of the quote; women are without a doubt the gatekeepers of sex. They hold close to all the sexual leverage in the SMP, but the disillusion that men have more of a say in who they get into a relationship with than women, is a conclusion that has no basis in reality and this is for two reasons.

1) the implication of the quote is that the average man, the below average man and the above average man is lining up in abundance to have sex with the average woman which I’ve already conceded to be true, but the inverse isn’t. The average woman, the below average woman, and the above average woman isn’t lining up in great numbers to be in a relationship with the average man.

2) The natural progression of a relationship as we know it is the following: The man approaches> The woman accepts his advances if she finds him sufficiently attractive > he displays his personality (this is where the courting and dates happen) > they eventually have sex > they get into a relationship. In this linear progression, how does the man have more of a say of who he is in a relationship with than the woman? She accepts his advances, and if she doesn’t find him appealing she would have rejected him when he originally made his advances.

The way I understand it is that women hold both the leverage for sex and relationships, while it’s only the men at the top who hold any meaningful leverage when it comes to relationships. Women want to lock down a prize and make him commit to her because they innately have options. Men can’t say the same.